I am eerily calm . . .

. . . or so I have been told countless times over the past few weeks. Apparently I have lost my vibrancy and contagious ecxitement that I used to have and am now someone who clearly has so much on their mind and shoulders. That may be true but is it such a bad thing??? If its not, then how come when I get told and I quote "Your sudden calmness is freaky - like your about to blow", it is said with a few receding steps and a mental flee!!! Now the worst one was "What happened to you, your calmer, I don't like it."

So I am not as hyper as I used to be a few months ago. SO FUCKING WHAT!!! Are people not allowed to change?? Is this not a sign of growing up?? Am I not allowed to actually show that I might be going through some rough times?? Am I to always be Little Miss Sunshine despite all the rains?? Am I not allowed to HAVE problems??

I have two little words to say to you guys.

FUCK OFF